Supermom

For ages men have been going off to war, on hunting trips etc...since the dawn of time. Take for instance the Spartan people (not the ones of today but the serious warriors)...The men would leave at least 3 times a year to go to war and the women would say goodbye each time as if it was their last. They would always tell them "With this shield or on it". BD and I have had 7 1/2 years of coming and going. From the navy where he would leave for 1-6 months to this new job where he was leaving every other month for a month at a time. And when we lived back in Athens and other women would ask what does your husband do, I would tell them and then tell them how often he left. And every time I would get this look and the words "OMG girl I don't know how you do it", and every time I would say the same thing "You get used to it. Its not me making the sacrifices its him". Every other month I would drive 1.5 hours and say goodbye to the love of my life, knowing he would be back in a month but still in the back of me there was a worry that this could be the last, and so I would drive home that 1.5 hours crying because my best friend wasn't riding next to me. I know some wives say bye for a lot longer than that but after having him home for a month straight and then all of a sudden my bed was empty it kinda hurts. A month later I would pick him up and it was like someone had glued all the pieces back together and I was whole. My best friend, husband and soul mate was next to me each night when I went to sleep and there when I woke up. And then one day BD popped up and said hey we're moving to Houston. And at first I really didn't want to my family and friends were in Athens and it was a long ways away...but then I thought every night and every morning there he would be, sleeping peacefully next to me. I could curl up and put my head on his chest and he wouldn't go anywhere. Well we moved and then I got hit with the "hey I gotta go overseas for a couple weeks" Before it was just a domestic flight in the US but now its overseas. Needless to say I was very unhappy. The first trip was at the worse possible time. He missed my birthday and our wedding anniversary. Oh and did I mention that Houston got hit by a HUGE hurricane like 3 days after he left. It was horrible! So when he finally did come home I told him no more. Well about 2 weeks ago he popped up and said...I gotta go to Singapore again. I was like NO WAY. He told me it was for a week but then a week later it changed to 2 weeks and then Monday it changed to 9 days. And now I look back and I think about all those wives that asked me HOW DO YOU DO IT! and I think to myself I have NO clue how I managed to be without him so much. In 2 years he was home 9 months and it was "ok" with me, but now that he has been home and with me all the time (yes sometimes I wish to just strangle him) I cant help but cry again. I remember watching him in the rear view mirror walking away from the van and crying...now I have to watch him walk out the door. For 7.5 years I've always had to say goodbye at some point and watch him walk away whether it be down a pier onto an awaiting submarine or to an airport onto a plane or even watching him walk out the front door of our home to get into an awaiting car it kills me every time. I told him today when he made me cry by giving me another hug (after my "final hug" I can only do one at a time on these trips) "It never fails"...I am always going to cry and I'm always going hurt because even though I know he'll be home in 9 days its as if I'm that Spartan woman standing in the field handing my husband his shield and telling him goodbye. Yes I know I'm the biggest cry baby but if you've ever felt for someone the way I feel for my husband and have to tell them goodbye or see ya in a week/month/year you know how it feels and you know where I'm coming from. I have to say this for those wives whose husbands serve in the military I have the utmost respect for you. You are stronger than many of us to be able to say goodbye to someone you love and know maybe they wont be coming home or not knowing when they'll step off that boat or plane is more then I can take anymore. I think now I'm one of those women asking "HOW DO YOU DO IT?!"

~~~SUPERMOM~~~